Monday, December 23, 2013

The Twelve Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas, 

My class got crafty, and made cinnamon ornaments for a tree. We cut them out on Friday and I left them to dry over the weekend. When I got in on Monday, I hid the dried ornaments in one of my cupboards so that they wouldn't be distracting to my kids. Still, they were very fragrant, so the second they walked in the room they smelled cinnamon and wanted to know exactly where the ornaments were. Barrett came in a little bit late and missed the hubbub about the ornaments. He put his backpack away and said, "What is that smell?" Having already threatened -er I mean told- my kids that if they let the ornaments distract them from doing their bell work we would not finish decorating them later in the day- everyone stayed quietly focused on their work.

Barrett: "Seriously guys, what is that smell? (turning to all the students at his table one by one) You smell that right? That smell. What is it? Do you smell that?" And not one student answered him.

Finally he turned to me and said, "Is that an actual smell that everyone smells? Or is Tinkerbell tickling my nose?"


On the second day of Christmas, 

Claudio chased Leslie, and tried to give her a kiss on her cheek. Claudio has always been a hugger, but recently he has been really into kissing people. Seriously. He will run up to one of his classmates, lock them in a big ole bear hug and kiss them on their cheeks. Girls, boys, doesn't matter who; Claudio loves everyone. I have found myself saying, "Hands free and lips free" an obscene amount these last couple of weeks. When I pulled him aside to tell him how inappropriate it was to kiss his classmates he just shook his fists at the ceiling.


On the third day of Christmas, 

Barrett said to me, something awesome- I think you'll agree. Every day I have to walk my kids out to the bus in a line and make sure that everyone gets on the right bus. Barrett is the first one we drop off. Every day he runs up to me and gives me a big hug and yells, "Bye teacher! You're the best!" Then, he lowers his voice so only I can hear, and in a voice that can only be described as the House-Bunny-Exorcist voice he says, "I love you." It is so awesome.




On the fourth day of Christmas, 

Claudio did something else blog-worthy and interrupted important testing. The whole class was on laptops for our district-wide testing this week. I said to them, "Alright, on the count of three everyone is going to open their laptops. 1, 2, 3!"

21 laptops opened simultaneously.

"Very good. Now when I say go, everyone open your internet browser. G-"

Claudio: "NO! NO! STOP MISS EARL! BOWSER IS THE BAD GUY! DON'T DO IT!"




On the fifth day of Christmas, 

All my kids and me made pet reindeers! After they cut the reindeer pattern out, they got to decorate them however they wanted. Barrett was so excited by this project. He kept laughing and giggling and saying, "He is going to be so cute!" He would glue something on the reindeer and exclaim every single time, "Man, this just looks so cute!"

Finally, he turns to me and says, "Miss Earl, I know cool guys don't really say the word cute. And I know it's weird for such a cool guy to be saying that a reindeer is cute, but I just can't help it! He is SO CUTE!"


On the sixth day of Christmas, 

My student brought to me new detergent for my luandry. I was about to call his mom to make sure that she intended for him to give it to me, but then I remembered I was running low on detergent and accepted it for the odd-but-useful gift that it was. But still, note to all parents: if random stuff in your house goes missing there is a good chance your kids are bringing it to their school teachers.

I also got a mug and some hand sanitizer. It was a pretty good year for me. 


On the seventh day of Christmas,

Claudio interrupted our testing again - this time no lips.  I was walking around monitoring the room and every time I passed Claudio's desk he kept trying to get out of his seat to give me a hug. I kept reminding him that during tests we have to keep our pockets glued to the seat. Finally, when I saw him about to lunge for a hug the third time I said to him, "Claudio, if I see your pockets leave that seat you are going straight to a yellow card."

In an angry and threatening whisper he replied, "Miss Earl, one of these days I'm going to hug you and I'm never going to let go."


On the eighth day of Christmas, 

We did a partner math activity- and everyone learned,  minus Claudio. Knowing that Claudio has some issues focusing on his work, I paired him with one of my little know-it-alls, Katie. As I was monitoring the class, I passed them and they had most of their page filled out. Impressed, I said, "Katie, has Claudio been helping you solve the problems?"
She said, "No, not at all. I even tried to give him the easy ones, like, 'Claudio, what is three plus seven?' and all he said was something about a metal hammer. I think it has to do with Mario..."


On the ninth day of Christmas, 

Liva was sassy. No surprise there. We were talking about Christmas coming up and one of my students said something about needing to be good this week.
Me: "Remember, Santa isn't just watching you this week, he's been watching you all year to see if you've been good."
Liva: "Oh my gosh, Santa is such a stalker."


On the tenth day of Christmas, 

We played Scattergories, and my kids couldn't even beat me. 
We were playing a game like Scattergories and the kids had to think of a place that started with an 'O'.
Jorge: How do you spell ocean?
Cristian: O-C-E......  Wait, is there an S?.... Or an H?..... I think there's an A in it..... (sounds it out slowly to himself again).... there's an N..... Dude, just put sea.


On the eleventh day of Christmas, 

A mother came to me, upset because her daughter was blackmailed. 
Me: Isabella, why don't you tell me what happened.
Isabella: The boy, he dropped his book and I said, "Ha! Ha!" and he said, "That's not nice. I am gonna tell teacher." And I said, "No, don't" and then I said, "I have candy?" and he said, "Do you have blue?" And I said, "I don't have it here it's at my house. I think I have green, pink, and yellow." And he said if I brought him some he wouldn't tell you because I didn't want to get a yellow card.

How can her mom be mad at the other kid when it was basically Isabella's idea in the first place? The best part was the mom said, "Now, I had her bring the candy because she said she would and I want her to be a person of her word." Some people...


On the twelfth day of Christmas, 

We watched Polar Express and did absolutely no learning. 

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

7 comments:

  1. Your kids are straight up crazy. There is just no way around it. And I love them all for it.

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  2. Is every class like yours or did you just get really lucky?

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  3. Let's be real, Santa is totally a stalker.

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  4. i enjoy your posts so much although i don't love my students as much as you do! please still keep blogging ! that way i can discover my love for them sometimes ……

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  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  6. Look at all this love, hugging, and kissing action you are getting. Get it player

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  7. You have the best class ever. They are freaking hilarious.

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